


Monstrosity of the Mind

by sisterxmorphine



Category: Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Post-House of M, post-AvX
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-12-25 23:50:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18271604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sisterxmorphine/pseuds/sisterxmorphine
Summary: The famed Scarlet Witch deals with her internal struggles as she grows older, and is still haunted by ghosts from her past.





	Monstrosity of the Mind

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little one shot that was written a while ago and I decided that I would post it here. Enjoy!

No one is free from making mistakes. And everyone has done things that they aren’t proud of, and if they haven’t they will. Wanda would reassure herself, but nothing could ease what she had felt about her past.

She wasn’t what she used to be, but that didn’t stop people from looking at her like she was a monster. At least there were still plenty of people that considered her a hero, even after her history.

Sometimes you lose control, sometimes you don’t have control to begin with. Sometimes you break, and even if you are put back together you are never the same. And what you try to fix can still fall back apart. Not all, but some things.

Though she would be reassured by others that she was still a hero and even heroes make mistakes, she couldn’t help but know she was unforgivable. She felt that she didn’t deserve it after all that had happened.

It still haunted her. She would often lay awake in bed, her mind playing her wrongdoings over and over. It would eat her alive as she recalled how she felt. It was terrifying, to say the least. To be capable of terrible things, and to carry out terrible things. She tortured herself when she would tell herself that she didn’t deserve to be still allowed to act in this world.

It’s a sick and twisted thought to think of yourself to not have a place in this world, even more so when you think you don’t deserve a place in this world. But what is morbid to others becomes normal in the mind of the one afflicted with such ideas.

Wanda couldn’t help it. It was there in the back of her mind, always there like a monster hiding in the shadows just waiting to attack its prey. Nobody could really understand, she couldn’t come close to putting into words what she could feel and thought about herself. She did speak on the bad things in her life, but nothing ever came close to articulating what lingered in the darker parts of her psyche.

Maybe she really was a monster, teeth not fully bared but still ready to snap. She feared herself as she knew she was an unstable power. Even so, it drained her to be in the darkness. Each day she felt weak, even if she didn’t let it show. There were times she felt like giving up, too often she felt that.

—

As she walks along a dark and lonely corridor. It too eerily resembles the depths of her mind; the anxious feeling that something could be out there and could reveal its malicious self.

The sound of her steps upon the ground is the only sound she hears, besides the occasional whistling of wind through the empty arches. Her fingertips slide along cold stone wall as she continues on. She’s searching, but for what? She feels like a lost child, a scared and lost child. 

There’s something there, following her but ahead of her as well. She tenses up as she realizes she’s not alone anymore. Wanda knows whatever it is, it isn’t anywhere near benevolent. Her fists ball up at her sides as she stops, listening and looking on. 

The moonlight that was above her now gets concealed by dark clouds. It’s cold and she gets chills as she stands there, not alone but not knowing what else is there. Wanda draws in a deep breath but she grows shaky as she exhales. There’s a tightness in her chest as she has begins to have trouble breathing. She is riddled with fear, and there’s nothing she can do. 

She’s frozen as a faint whisper rises through the air. She doesn’t know what it’s saying, or who it is, but it’s nothing of a good spirit.

Darkness creeps upon her as if it’s a palpable being. It’s begins to wrap itself around her, holding her in its tendrils. She squeezes her eyes shut as she expects the worst. Wanda can’t bring herself to fight this off, not even able to move at all.

She opens her eyes again and her eyes dart around he, still transfixed. Out of the darkness ahead rises a figure that makes its way to her. There’s more that appear all around her. As they get closer she can make out their appearance.

It’s herself.

Not a healthy, vibrant Wanda, but a bedraggled and unstable witch. The Scarlet Witch, eyes glowing red and her features only showing anger. Everyone surrounding her is a copy of the figure before her. They all reach for Wanda, hands seemingly like claws. They open their mouths, showing razor sharp teeth. Wanda screams, something bloodcurdling as she braces herself for the imminent and violent end.

—

The scream carried on as she finds herself alone in her bed. She sits upright. 

It was just a dream? A nightmare.

It had felt so real. She felt trapped in the clutches of dark energy.

Wanda doesn’t feel safe, not in her own home. But this wasn’t the work of someone else sleeping into her dreams, just herself. She was her own greatest and darkest enemy.

She slides out of her bed, wrapping a sweater around her body as she heads to the bathroom. She turns on the water and leans over the sink, splashing cold water into her face that beads of sweat had ran down. It sends a shiver up her spine, and when her hands are dry she pulls her sweater tighter around her body.

Wanda looks into the mirror, at her own reflection. She looks tired, and not just because she woke up in the middle of the night, but tired as one can be as the weight of their whole world pushes down on their shoulders. There’s light missing from her eyes, and she thinks how a smile would look so fabricated upon her face.

It almost makes her cry. Having come this far and not being able to get rid of the demons that seek to destroy her from within. It shows that they are making their way out, ready to burst free. But she tells herself that she can hold them back, That’s she’s still strong.

She goes back to her bed and curls up beneath the heavy blankets. Outside of the window she notices the sun seeming to burn up the city skyline as it rises. Her eyes fixate on the warm colors, and there’s something calming about it. Wanda lays there for a while before she falls back to sleep. But as she watched the sunrise, she recounted everything good in her life.

Her brother who would protect her no matter what. Who would be there for her if she just called him to be.

The friends she often finds surrounding herself with.

The people that look up to her, that look at her as their savior. Even when going through hell, Wanda remains a hero. Nothing can change that. Not darkness, not pain, not the past.


End file.
